My Man

A recent conversation caused me to think about how I would like my future husband to act. I decided to make a list of 25 things I would like him to do. They’re kind of in an order, but not really.

1. Be accountable to someone other than himself and God
2. Pray for me… a LOT
3. Lead me in Bible studies
4. Tell me when I’m doing something that might not be in accordance with God’s word
5. Spend time with my family
6. Provide me with opportunities to befriend his family
7. Ask me on a date
8. Invite me to spend time with him on something that wouldn’t be considered a date
9. Surprise me
10. Be intelligent
11. Be funny
12. Be the most handsome man in the world to me
13. Enjoy sports and athletics
14. Eat fruits and veggies
15. Tease me, joke with me and have fun
16. Smile at me… a LOT
17. Hold my hand even around his friends
18. Bring me flowers occasionally for no reason
19. Send me a card occasionally for no reason
20. Hold my hair back when I’m sick
21. Write and/or sing me a love song, even if it’s terrible ^_^
22. Tell me I’m beautiful
23. Not tell me he loves me until he proposes
24. Not kiss me until our wedding
25. Be able to talk to me about anything

All of this is of course on top of the basic traits he must possess – a passion for God, integrity, honesty, patience, faith, love, gentleness, kindness, oh yeah… and be stronger than me *~.^

I’m more than a little high-maintenance.

Rest Is My Friend

So for the last couple of days, I’ve pretty much done nothing except for be athletic. On Friday I did a bunch of swimming, played about a gazillion games of volleyball, a quick game of Ultimate Frisbee, and a couple variations of lightning. Yesterday, I did some softball hit around with some of the most amazing people I’ve been blessed to meet. During softball, I also did some fastpitch pitching which I haven’t done in over 2 years. Today, I am sore. I’m remembering that I have muscles that I haven’t used recently, simply because they hurt. But praise God, it’s a good hurt! And praise God, it’s Sunday! Sunday is my favorite day today because God told us to remember the Sabbath and keep it holy. He told us to work six days and rest on the seventh, and that certainly is what I plan on doing today. I’m hoping once school starts I’ll remember how good it is to rest and not sin against God by waiting until Sunday night to finish my homework. Somehow procrastination and obeying God don’t mesh well, so one of them will have to go. And I’ll give you a hint: God’s not going anywhere. I want y’all to hold me to that too. Please keep me accountable in that area. Anyway…. yay rest!

On another topic, I did some reading in 1Kings today, specifically some of the stuff involving Elijah. You know, I thought I was madly in love with Paul, but Elijah is so darn attractive as well. This was a man of God. Elijah was a man of faith. There was definitely open communication between Elijah and God. When he went to the widow to be fed, he didn’t ask God why He sent him to a woman who barely had enough food for her and her child. Elijah said to woman, “… this is what the Lord, the God of Israel, says: ‘The jar of flour will not be used up and the jug of oil will not run dry until the day the Lord gives rain on the land.’” When Elijah challenged the prophets of Baal on Mount Carmel, he doused the offering in water. As I hope all of you know, water does not typically catch on fire well. Elijah knew that with God there is no impossible. The very God who created that water could consume it with fire just as easily. Elijah prayed and the fire of the Lord fell. Not only did the sacrifice get burned up, but the wood, the stones, the soil and even the water were all consumed by the fire! Now THAT is an impressive God! It’s crazy that Israel could deny him so many times… but don’t we in the same way put a limit on our God. Where is our faith to show this dieing world the One who came to save it? Why do we doubt that a God who raised the dead will heal us? Why do we doubt that a God who turned a poor Shepherd boy into a mighty king and warrior will provide us with financing? Why do we doubt that a God who used a prostitute to protect his servants will use us in an important way? We shouldn’t! So stop doubting and start living by faith! (This is much a command to me as it is to you).

I love you all, and hope you have a wonderful Sunday and have a blessed week and life. *hugs love and prayer*

Good or Bad?

I’m less stressed about what I’m going to do for school right now. Nothing dramatic has happened to change my financial status at all, I’m just not worried about it. I’m not sure if that’s a good or bad thing. Right now I’m pretty set on going to Cedarville. I’m going to try to get financed so I can go. If it’s God’s will for me to go there, I have no doubt that I’ll be driving down to Ohio at the expected time. Last night, I actually was pretty excited about starting school there. School won’t be starting till August, but I already started sorting out the clothes I want to (and can) take with me. I have so many clothes it’s not even funny. I think I’m gonna start dressing as I will have to there so I can get used to it. No shorts- bummer.

I still would like your continued prayer concerning my situation. Though I’m less stressed, God has more he can do with me

I really am thankful for all the praying y’all have done for me! It’s very encouraging!

And for everything you’ve done to help me, here’s my nephew to compliment the ladies… and just for you guys to laugh at ^_^

I love you all! *hugs love and prayer*

Majorly Stressin!

Could I please get y’all to pray for me? I’ve been way stressed out about school lately! Currently, I am planning to go to Cedarville University in the fall and major in Early Childhood Education. I also plan on playing softball while I’m there. I’ve been having some trouble figuring out how this all is going to work and my faith is not what it should be. As of right now, without any loans, I will owe CU about $25,000. I do not have $25,000. As a child I was never taught to save my money, so right now I’ve only got a little over $450 in the bank, which most of will probably go towards buying catcher’s gear. My mom has never been a saver either, and as such she has no funding to provide towards my college education. In fact, my mom actually has had some credit issues in the past which would prevent her from cosigning on a loan with me. So here I am… no job, no money, seemingly no way to get loans except possibly those with some ridiculous interest rate. Not to mention there seems to be no shortage of Elementary school teachers. *deep breath* Could it be that everything that was seemingly leading me to Cedarville was just coincidence?

Aside from the financial difficulties, I’ve also felt some promptings toward missionary work. Go figure! So on one hand I have the very expensive school where I would play softball and get to be surrounded by godly young men and women. On that same hand I have the chance meeting of the softball team while on Spring training in Florida, and the chance discussion with the coach’s daughter who was reading the same passage of Isaiah as I was and mentioned that they might need catchers for the upcoming year, and the chance meeting of their coach who told me to e-mail him without even having seen me play. On the other hand I have the great commission, possibly 2 years at New Tribes Ministry with significantly less financing, living with men and women of faith, and all the messages I’ve been hearing recently about faith and surrender.

Lord, where is surrender? Lord, where is faith? Am I believing You for financing for Cedarville? Certainly, if that’s your will, it will be done. The whole world is yours; $25,000 isn’t a grain of sand compared to all you are and all you have. Am I surrendering softball and everything that seemed to lead me to Cedarville to live a life of servitude in another country? Will I be blessed with the fire of your Holy Spirit and demonstrate your great love to those who have yet to learn your Name? In what manner am I to serve you? Lord, remove my doubt and lead me on in triumphal procession! Show me how I am to serve you! Lord, if that is you, tell me to come! It may not be the best night for water-walking, but who can resist your will? With you, the impossible is done.

Please pray for me! May God bless you now and always!

—-edit—-

And this was less stressful and more fun:

Photo-editing makes me happy… and completely unrelated, but for some reason I’m craving dill chips. Weird.. I don’t think that’s ever happened before.

Here’s a fun thing

INSTRUCTIONS
1. Type your answer to each of the questions below into Flickr Search.
2. Using only the first page of results, and pick one image.
3. Copy and paste each of the URLs for the images into Big Huge Lab’s Mosaic Maker to create a mosaic of the picture answers.

THE QUESTIONS:
1. What is your first name?
2. What is your favorite food? right now?
3. What high school did you go to?
4. What is your favorite color?
5. Who is your celebrity crush?
6. What is your favorite drink?
7. What is your dream vacation?
8. What is your favorite dessert?
9. What do you want to be when you grow up?
10. What do you love most in life?
11. What is one word that describes you?
12. What is your flickr name?

1. Genesis of The Birdsill Holly Society group, 2. Vegetarian Tacos even meat-eaters will love!, 3. Players from the 1952 St. John, North Dakota high school basketball team posing for statuettes for Curtis Strand of Strands Studio – Rugby, North Dakota., 4. ♫ YO Yo yo, there’s no place like a green penthouse… so i told the genie i wanted to be well hung. ^o^ ♫ nah… wildlife from singapore♫, 5. Jimmy Stewart TV Shot, 6. water droplets in the shower – o.k. bokeh, 7. Moonlight of Gold, 8. Samoas, 9. FIRE SHOT, 10. For the love of God, 11. Soft purple, 12. Wasp in flight nibbling arachnid

:-) Good Advice

Thank you for your advice. I think it all has merit. I was able to receive more specific advice from a good friend of mine, and I think he is wise beyond his years. He has helped me so much tonight in more than just figuring out whether or not to apologize. He taught me the value of using my own reasons in making decisions instead of worrying about what someone else will think.

Too often I try to be a people pleaser, and I think that may affect whether or not people see the real me. If I’m always worrying about what other people might think and act accordingly so that no one gets hurt, it may actually be hurting me and giving others an inaccurate representation. I need to apologize… not because he’s going or not going to react in a certain way. I need to apologize because I messed up. I need to apologize because I sinned against God. I need to apologize because I love God and my brother-in-Christ and would like to make amends. It’s my responsibility to apologize and I can do nothing beyond that. I would love for my apology to be accepted, but there’s not a thing I can do if it’s not. When I apologize God will see my heart and judge that it is genuine.

This is all tentative of course… I plan on apologizing, but I’m gonna pray about it first…

Also… my friend revealed to me that I need to stick to knowing my own thoughts rather than assuming I know someone else’s thoughts. I struggle with this sometimes when I think I know someone very well. I will have to work on it, but I believe I’ll be better off when I let someone else declare what they’re thinking or feeling.

Also, also… I love you God bless!

Advice?

So, I need some advice on a situation I’m currently facing. I’m not quite sure what to do. Here’s the story: I used to have this friend who was my best friend, and for whatever reason we stopped being friends. Now, I thought that a brother and sister in Christ should be able to get along and be friends regardless of whatever happened between them. Such a friendship, I felt would be a testimony to God. We decided to be friends, but after a little while in the friendship it was clear to me that I was the only one making an effort to be friends. In fact, I think I was being treated worse than any random sister in Christ would be by my “friend.” I discussed with him what I had been feeling and it came out that he didn’t think it was possible for him to be my friend and that he actually didn’t even WANT to be my friend. I was hurt. I was hurt so bad. Because I was hurt, I got angry, and I actually started to hate this person. I know hate is a strong word, but that is truly what I felt. He sent me an apology via facebook and said that we could try to be friends and he would try not to be dumb about it, but by the time that was sent I was so angry at him that if I sent anything back it would have just been me trying to be mean to him. That was about a month ago. Since then I’ve cooled off a lot. I actually haven’t hated him for quite some time. It’s not easy for me to stay angry with someone, especially when they don’t deserve it. Right now, I’m at the point where I want to apologize for being irrationally angry and for causing disunity within the body of Christ. I don’t know how he’d take it though. In fact, if I had to guess, I’d probably say that he’d be just as happy never hearing from me again. This makes me sad because he’s such a great person and I really wish I were friends with him… but there’s not much I can do about it.

Prayer

Please pray for me.

When I Listen and Obey

Often when I hear gentle whispers of the Holy Spirit they go unheeded, usually because I’m having a pity party and would rather sulk than fix the problem. Last night, when my mind wanted to go into self-pity mode, I refused and instead sought after God and the power that is in His name. While proclaiming the power of Christ over myself to resist the lies of the devil, I found the references for the word “Name” in the concordance of my Bible. Here are a few of the passages of scripture I found in Psalms during my search:

Psalms 9:9-10
“The Lord is a refuge for the oppressed, a stronghold in times of trouble. Those who know your name will trust in you, for you, Lord, have never forsaken those who seek you.”

Psalms 20:6-8
“Now I know that the Lord saves his anointed; he answers him from his holy heaven with the saving power of his right hand. Some trust in chariots and some in horses, but we trust in the name of the Lord our God. The are brought to their knees and fall, but we rise up and stand firm.”

Psalms 34
“I will extol the Lord at all times; his praise will always be on my lips. My soul will boast in the Lord; let the afflicted hear and rejoice. Glorify the Lord with me; let us exalt his name together. I sought the Lord, and he answered me; he delivered me from all my fears. Those who look to him are radiant; their faces are never covered with shame. This poor man called, and the Lord heard him; he saved him out of all his troubles. The angel of the Lord encamps around those who fear him, and he delivers them. Taste and see that the Lord is good; blessed is the man who takes refuge in him. Fear the Lord, you his saints, for those who fear him lack nothing. The lions may grow weak and hungry, but those who seek the Lord lack no good thing. Come, my children, listen to me; I will teach you the fear of the Lord. Whoever of you loves life and desires to see many good days, keep your tongue from evil and your lips from speaking lies. Turn from evil and do good; seek peace and pursue it. The eyes of the Lord are on the righteous and his ears are attentive to their cry; the face of the Lord is against those who do evil, to cut off the memory of them from the earth. The righteous cry out, and the Lord hears them; he delivers them from all their troubles. The Lord is close to the brokenhearted and saves those who are crushed in spirit. A righteous man may have many troubles, but the Lord delivers him from them all; he protects all his bones, not one of them will be broken. Evil will slay the wicked; the foes of the righteous will be condemned. The Lord redeems his servants; no one will be condemned who takes refuge in him.”

My put in bold the parts of the scriptures that really spoke to me. I feel that God was showing me those verses to encourage me in seeking him. He was showing me that He really is listening to me; that when I listen and obey I’m not just reading, I’m being instructed and encouraged by my almighty creator!

I sought God, and he said that he’ll never forsake me.

I trusted in His Name, and he said I will rise up and stand firm.

I sought the Lord and he answered me and delivered me from my fears.

I sought the Lord he said I will lack no good thing.

I was brokenhearted and he was close to me.

I was crushed in spirit and he saved me.

God knows that I’m seeking Him and he’s rewarding me for it more than I could ever deserve. I hope that next time Satan tries to bring me down I’ll have the faith to stand and say, “Your power over me was lost when Christ died to set me free! I’m a child of the King and he will never leave me nor forsake me. Praise God!”… and then of course I’ll have to start singing Romans 16:19!!!

Father, Savior, Mighty King
Of your strength I need to sing
Come into my heart and live
Let my life be yours to give